I crave grey

I used to tell people the worst things about me and point out all of my flaws just so they would go away. It is what I did to protect myself from getting hurt or letting anyone get to really know me. I had done it for years. On the other extreme, in the past few years, I stopped sharing any details or stories about me so that no one would ever get to know me. Everything has been so black or white. Cliched, I know but I don't know how to express it any other way. Lately, my past has been colliding with my present. I have been talking about both the good and the bad without being extreme in my presentation. People usually leave me now. One did at the beginning of the year, but no one else is running away. What do I do now?